Training Log: 02/11/13 – 02/17/13

Monday Feb. 11th: 2.25 mi on the treadmill in 19:31. first two miles in 17:28, last quarter in 2:03. Earlier, I did 90 push ups in 3 min in the afternoon. Another set of 50 followed by lunges before I ran. Planks after the run.

Tuesday Feb. 12th: One mile easy on the treadmill in the morning (8:34). Followed this up by doing 80 push ups in 3 min, then some lunges, hamstring bridges, and calf drops on the stairs.

Wednesday Feb. 13th: Let’s let Red narrate this one: “I wish I could tell you that Eric fought the good fight, and the demons let him be. I wish I could tell you that – but the road to recovery is no fairy-tale world. He never said he didn’t workout, but we all knew. Things went on like that for awhile – a runner’s life consists of routine, and then more routine. Every so often, Eric would show up with fresh motivation. The demons kept at him – sometimes he was able to fight ’em off, sometimes not. And that’s how it went for Eric – that was his routine. I do believe those first two years were the worst for him, and I also believe that if things had gone on that way, this place would have got the best of him.”

That’s my Shawshank Redemption-style way of saying I didn’t run. I didn’t do much of anything, except for 94 push ups in 3 minutes.

Thursday Feb. 14th: My Valentine’s Day gift to myself was to finally workout. Started out with a mile on the treadmill at home (8:23), then some quick lunges before I headed out the door for the final .7 mi run over to the pool (5:26 for that leg, 13:50 total).

Luckily there were only two people in the water, one of which was Allison McCabe. Plenty of room for everyone. I feel real bad because I think I had a frog in my throat, and for the next 45 minutes I was constantly attempting to clear my throat. If she noticed it, she didn’t say anything, but I was annoying even myself so I can only imagine how bad it sounded to her.

Workout was 15 x 60 second intervals with 30 seconds of aqua jogging rest. Before getting into those I continued my warm up by doing another 20 min of easy aqua jogging. Then it was ‘game on’ for my first real workout in about nine stinkin’ days.

The waters were calm, as they typically are in this pool. Sometime during the workout a larger woman entered the waters (after Allison left, so naturally there wasn’t a witness to back me up on the following story). This plus-sized woman didn’t really “jump out” at me until she literally just started jumping up and down in the shallow end. She had very large breasts, which I only mention because they’re a part of the human anatomy and in this case they were hitting the water with such force as to turn the pool into a large wave pool. I’m guessing it was part of some workout, but I still can’t see what she was trying to accomplish aside from scarring me for life. It was like a nightmare version of the Michelle Jenneke dance. One that would scar you for life if you saw it.

The reason this is so noteworthy to me was because I guess I tend to carry my head low while aqua jogging, with my mouth open. Like I said before, the waters there are typically calm so I haven’t had any issues with getting water into my mouth or lungs. On two occasions I turned around and was snapped out of my workout trance by an unexpected tidal wave of water smacking my face and attempting to breach my lungs. As crass as it sounds, she was basically titty slapping a tsunami of dirty pool water into my mouth. It was very gross.

There would be breaks in her “routine” so the waters would calm a bit, but then sure enough I’d make the turn from the far wall only to be greeted by a scene reminiscent of A Perfect Storm. It really was quite astounding, but she was creating this ripple effect from her weird “workout” which made the water choppier than I’d ever seen there. Would somebody please unrelease the damn Kracken! That’s the last time I leave the head of Medusa at home.

Topped it off with a run home in 6:28, with the legs feeling like jelly the whole way. No push ups today. Obese cougar krackens aside, I survived the workout. I’m still shaking my head thinking back on this. If only you knew just how big this pool is and just how much this one woman was disturbing the waters. Wow.

Friday Feb. 15th: Adrift on a lethargic life raft on a sea laziness.

Saturday Feb. 16th: Ditto.

Sunday Feb. 17th: Nada. I did get in 100 push ups in 3 minutes. Push-Up Project: Day Four report coming soon. Also, my wife did make me these:

That would tempt most people to not run. Although I could’ve done both, it still was worth mentioning. Pancakes with a homemade blackberry syrup. Good lord…

Summary: Awful week. If it wasn’t for the Obese Cougar Kracken then it’d be embarrassing to post this. Maybe that story will be entertaining to some and help draw attention away from the goose eggs I put up. My motivation is at an all-time low. Maybe not all-time low, but it’s definitely in the vicinity of the 2002-2005 era where I basically gave up on running. Not giving up here but I am struggling to get into a steady groove.


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About ejnshow

Runner. Writer. Lover of the absurd. Hobbies include bringing all three of these elements together.

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